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About Varied / Hobbyist Official Beta Tester Kendra24/Female/United States Groups :iconfrozenenchantment-fc: FrozenEnchantment-FC
 
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Which version of Kaityena do you prefer? fav.me/d7myu4y 

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6 deviants said The one with the leg markings
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No deviants said The one without the leg markings. Leave her as she is!

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I'm done. I quit. I give up.

Journal Entry: Sun Dec 14, 2014, 5:29 PM
Warning: this is a long vent.



I'm tired of always trying and always failing and always being wrong, no matter what I do, even if I do what I'm told to do, I'm still wrong.  I can't do anything right.  I can't say anything right.  I can't be anything right.  I'm just wrong.  Everything about me and my existence is wrong.

I can't be a good friend.  I can't be a good employee.  I can't be a good person.  I can't be a good anything.

I just drove home, crying harder than I did when Tiny died.  I'm so frustrated with everything and my own fucking pathetic existence and everything about me.  I'm so repulsive to myself because of whatever it is that I do to deserve such a life of pure hell.  I can't do ANYTHING right!

So I quit!  I'm done.  I'm not going out of my way to talk to people anymore, especially when they don't even want to talk to me to begin with.  I'm not going out of my way to do things for people anymore.  I'm just not.  I'm done.  I do nothing but bend over backwards for anybody and everybody, practically giving EVERYONE the shirt off my back at the drop of a hat.  And what do I get in return?

I get called condescending, I get called a bully, or I just get flat out ignored, looked over, neglected, and treated like I'm below everyone else.  Like I don't know a thing about what I'm doing or talking about.  I'm just someone to use and mistreat until I've dried out of usefulness, then I'm discarded like the most disgusting piece of trash there is.

People can't even RECOGNIZE when I'm crying out for help, or when I'm hurting.  It's like they don't even care!  And that's because they don't!  I'm sick of people lying to me...and always hurting me... I'm just done trying...

So from now on, I'm done.  I'm not talking to people, I'm not going out of my way to do shit.

You know what?  I might even deactivate deviantART, Skype, Facebook, EVERYTHING.  And just disappear.  Hell, might even change my cell phone number.  I'm just sick of always being hurt.

I'm just not meant to be happy.  No matter what I do.  I'm not meant to have real friends, or to be loved, or to feel loved, or to be happy.

It's just meant to be...and I'm tired...

I'm tired of always hurting... I'm just so tired...


I don't have an Absol-sona for no reason....


Oh, and if you cared enough to read this far, and if you even care enough to listen, just to get an idea of where I'm coming from right now, then listen to these three songs.

ALL of them.








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GirlKaito's Profile Picture
GirlKaito
Kendra
Artist | Hobbyist | Varied
United States
Profile picture © mr-tiaa
Cosplayers are myself as demon Naruto, and my friend as fem!Naruto



No Requests by SweetDukeGifts - Friends Only by SweetDukeTrades - Closed by SweetDukeCollaborations - Closed by SweetDuke
Commissions - Ask Me by SweetDukePoint Commissions - Ask Me by SweetDukeKiribans - On Hold by SweetDukeNo ACEOs by SweetDuke


Name: Kendra
Gender: Female
Age: 24
Hair color: Very dark brown/jet black
Eye color: Dark green
Religion: Christian

Shipping likes: AnnaxKristoff, Pokéshipping/AAML, Contestshipping, Penguinshipping, Rocketshipping, Ichihime, TsukunexMoka, HopexVanille, CloudxTifa, LinkxZelda, TohruxKyo, most anything canon
Shipping hates: Elsanna, AnnaxHans, ElsaxHans, ElsaxKristoff, JackxElsa, JackxAnna, HansxKristoff, Wreck-It-RalphxElsa, JasminexVolkner, Flight, Lightis, LightxCloud, LightxHope, LightxCaius, SerahxNoel, NxTouko, Advanceshipping, Pearlshipping, Negaishipping, SasukexSakura, Rock LeexSakura, Ulquihime
Other hates: Yaoi, yuri, incest, hentai, onions, spiders, trolls, flamers, drama
Deviant since Feb. 1, 2008
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Comments


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:icondreamynaria:
DreamyNaria Featured By Owner 3 days ago  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thanks for the fav!! Did you see my gallery? :)
Reply
:icongirlkaito:
GirlKaito Featured By Owner 3 days ago  Hobbyist General Artist
Yes, it's all very beautiful. ^^
Reply
:iconaffectionsxtouchingx:
AffectionsXTouchingX Featured By Owner 5 days ago   Writer
Hey just curious....how come you still have "A nobody" on your thingy on your profile? I thought you were feeling better?
Reply
:icongirlkaito:
GirlKaito Featured By Owner 5 days ago  Hobbyist General Artist
Oh whoops, I did that yesterday, but haven't changed it yet. ^^;
Reply
:iconaffectionsxtouchingx:
AffectionsXTouchingX Featured By Owner 5 days ago   Writer
Oh its okay xD I was just worried you were still upset
Reply
:icongirlkaito:
GirlKaito Featured By Owner 5 days ago  Hobbyist General Artist
Lol no, sorry. ^^;
Reply
:iconshe-wolfofthenorth:
She-WolfOfTheNorth Featured By Owner Dec 13, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you for the favorite. :D
Reply
:iconnikthecat14:
nikthecat14 Featured By Owner Dec 9, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks for the fave! :heart:
Reply
:iconherebedragons2014:
HereBeDragons2014 Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thank you for the favorite.
Reply
:iconmoealmighty:
MoeAlmighty Featured By Owner Dec 1, 2014
thank you for the fave miss
Reply
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